Shaloch Manos

Ladies and Gentlemen--- Why are men labeled gentle? and if men are so gentle, does that imply that ladies are not???? ADAR IS HERE-- HalachaBoy and TorahTown (which was walled from the times of Joshua) are excited to present to you a special Purim Edition of HalachaBoy- For the next three weeks, iy'h, we will provide the best, most exciting halachos and stories to fulfill your Purim crave for Torah, Halacha and of course, Hamintashin. This week we start off with the most famous discussion in all of Purim Torah- Why do we give Shaloch Manos? We all know there is a requirement to give to at least two people two readily edible food items which have different brachos- (and the Shulchan Aruch adds if you come up with a theme, and add bows, ribbons and crunchy paper then that's even better [Editors' Note- the Shulchan Aruch never said it, but more on that later]). But why do we do it? The Terumos Hadashan, said the reason is so everyone has food at his Seuda (the festive meal that is required later on purim day). Since, we don't want to label people as poor we give to everyone, but the essence is to provide for another Purim Seuda. While the Menos Halevi, Rav Shlomo Alkabetz (from such fame as author of the Lecha Dodi) says the reason is to increase friendship and comradery in klal yisroel. We all know Haman wanted to destroy the Jews because they were an Am Mefuzar (spread out nation), thus to rectify this flaw we must unite and increase our brotherhood. Hundreds of seforim have been written about this argument with hundreds of practical differences in which these two Torah Giants would argue. I would like to quickly discuss three, and open the floor for anyone to email me (TheHalachaBoy@gmail.com) if you think of any else. 1. Can you give non-food items? According to Terumos Hadeshen, no-- the whole reason is for food for the seuda--- no food, no mitzvah. According to Rav Alkabetz, yes--- in fact, giving anything that someone would appreciate and thus enhance his relationship with you is good. The rumor has it that Rav Alkabetz actually named the book Menos Halevi because of this response and he would give it to all those on purim day to fulfill his mitzvah of Shaloch Manos. 2. What if the receiver (presumably an over concerned mother whose children already have giant bowls of candy) turns down the Shaloch Manos?- Once again according to the Teromos Hadeshen, no-- because the bottom line is you didn't provide food for that families Seuda, while Rav Alkabetz would say (as any lame gift giver would ) its the thought that counts--- so even if you turn it down, still think highly and love that that Jew a little more. 3. Can one give anonymously- To this the sides flip- The Terumos Hadeshen would say - it is ok for one to give anonymously- as stated earlier as long as the receipt has food for his meal- the giver's requirement is fulfilled. However, according to Menos HaLevi's reasoning, one can only increase comradery if the recipient knows who the giver is, and thus since it is anonymous the requirement is not met. I would like to pose one more Purim nafka mina (practical difference)- Can one give a beautiful wrapped themed basket with no food inside for Shaloch Manos- (why would this happen? Perhaps, the theme is so ornate that adding the food would ruin it, or the giver was too busy with the theme they forgot to put in the goodies)- Would the Menos Halevi paskin that the giver has fulfilled his requirement because people like receiving pretty things (He allowed giving book's didn't he) and thus your mitzvah would be fulfilled- or perhaps even the Menos Halevi would say that this gift is no good because if there's no food the recipient would probably feel jipped and therefore would more likely decrease his love then increase it (I doubt he'd allow a book with the pages ripped out). Maybe it depends if the receiver is a girl or boy? But what if the boy is a Gentle man???? Bottom Line-- Theme's are cute and nice but packing those baskets with yummy, delicious, scrumptious foods makes everyone a winner --